- Generalised anxiety is the most common and usually people feel constant worry or tension, lethargic and obsess over negative things.
- Panic disorder is very different from generalised anxiety, it's not about worrying about normal things like losing your job as these are normal, it's severe and causes feelings of utter distress and doom, it strikes without warning and can last 10 minutes, in this time you usually have a panic attack.
- Social anxiety involves overwhelming worry and self-consciousness about everyday social situations. People usually worry about what everyone thinks of them and making even getting on a bus a hellish experience.
- Obsessive Compulsive Disorder is something I never thought was linked to anxiety but it can be very destructive to peoples lives, obsession is a thought based process and compulsion is a behaviour so they usually link and people who suffer then link things like having to switch the light off 10 times before bed with getting very sick and it can be very confusing to people around you and to yourself when you have this.
- Post Traumatic Stress Disorder is a condition that can develop following a traumatic or terrifying event, such as a physical assault, the unexpected death of a loved one, or a disaster. People with PTSD often have lasting and frightening thoughts and memories of the event.
- Agoraphobia is the fear of going out in public or unfamiliar places, lots of people have panic attacks when they go out so then eventually develop a fear of leaving their house or visiting anywhere that they don't know.
- Specific Phobias are intense feelings of fear because of objects, scenarios, animals, etc. Phobias generally bring about disaster thinking (believing that the worst will happen) or doing whatever it takes to avoid the phobia.
I just tried to get on with it and I didn't know this was what anxiety and depression was all about.
I developed a massive addiction to energy drinks around this time too. I was starting to fear going to work, even walking past used to make me feel sick, I remember once walking in the front door and straight out the back in a flood of tears and I didn't even know why, I was petrified of the place and I couldn't face even being near it. I continued to cry and run home when I got a bit scared or nervous about things and had these waves of panic.
I quit work eventually, I just stopped going, the thought of calling my boss to explain myself made me almost have breakdown, I hid in my flat not answering my phone or door.
I was starting to worry about what I was posting on my tumblr and twitter, wondering what people thought of me, I was so paranoid I just thought it was safer to stay in my flat with the people I knew and I'd be forever safe. The only time I'd go out was to get something to eat from Mcdonalds (and I'd eat one thing) or with my flatmate and boyfriend. I hid this really well, made up reasons why I couldn't go out or just ignored people because I thought they'd judge me.
My boyfriend and flat mate thought I was utterly insane, I think they were genuinely scared of me and my actions I became very abusive and angry because I was scared, ashamed and embarrassed of what I was doing and the fact I had no idea how to stop it.
From then on I decided it would be best to move back to my mums house and get away from the place that was a prison for me. I still sought help and was given different antidepressants, beta blockers to help with the heart palpitations and physical side of the anxiety and I was also assigned a crisis team as I was a high risk person (this is more the depression side) who put me in contact with Health In Mind I haven't had a big attack in a while and I've stopped taking medication, I have some that I keep handy for tough situations and for when I feel the familiar waves at my feet feeling, I felt mentally drained for a very long time but I do feel I am on the road to recovery, I was last hospitalised in September and I don't want to go back to where I was, It was a terribly dark place and I'm glad I got help and made it through. I do still get social anxiety most days even though I can talk to anyone in the street I constantly wonder how others perceive me and if everyone hates me but that's something I'm sure I'll get over in time.
I urge anyone who's suffering any symptoms of anxiety or depression to contact their Doctor as soon as possible, even if you don't want medication there are people who are there to help for a reason, seeking help isn't something to be ashamed of and admitting you need it isn't either.
- Go for a walk, yes it contradicts the agoraphobia side but if you don't suffer with this it's a brilliant way to get some fresh air, listen to some upbeat music and just zone out.
- Breathe, relax, take a big breath in through your nose, hold it and then out through your mouth while thinking about something awesome like Disney World. Or donuts. Or even how fine Channing Tatum is.
- Reward yourself for overcoming things. You got rid of that terrifying spider in your room so you definitely deserve that dress or Xbox game
- Eat and sleep well, eating junk is like being addicted to crack, even if its one fast food meal a week that you change, do it and cut caffeine and energy drinks! This will also help you with sleep. A good big of grub in your belly and a settled night sleep is a winning combo, if you like me have trouble sleeping grab a hot water bottle with a case and pop some get some lavender in the case and keep it under your pillow or use a sleeping mist! It really works.
- Tidy, you probably don't want to but honestly tidy room, tidy mind, nothing beats tidying up then a hot bath and clean sheets. And a hot chocolate. And maybe some more chocolate.
- The Anxiety UK website has some helpful links on it too!
If you made it all the way here congratulations, you're a trooper, I hope to write about a few different mental health topics especially how other people treat and perceive mental health and I really hope this was in some way helpful and if you'd like to contact me just email me :)
Take care of yourself